Thursday, May 19, 2011

Nerve Racking

Probably since far before I was even living in NC I was thinking about how labor would go. Who would watch the kids, where my mom would be, who my "replacement husband" would be, and if I would even make it to the hospital. I bothered my Mom all the time thinking about it and worrying about it but she just said, it's okay. Now today after my appointment she is all of a sudden realizing that the past few months of me freaking out is for a reason! I'm thankful to know she cares enough to be thinking this hard about it all but I can't help but to laugh at her because I've been trying to tell her all this for weeks!

We have the first dilemma of who can stay with the girls. Which I am lucky enough to have kids who are normally fine with whom ever I leave them with. The bigger the stranger the more they pull off on them. {You know like Ms. Nicole who has REAL tea parties with them. Btw Nicole still trying to find all the water on our tea set. lol} When my best friend Danielle watches Kylie she apparently just has her rolling laughing at all the funny things she says. Example from today: Kylie put blocks back into a bucket and proceeded to ask Danielle to clap for her, then took a bow and said thank you thank you! I believe that Danielle will be my main on call person for the girls. She works on weekend but other than that can normally be here, not to mention her whole family loves my girls and will be willing to help when they can. It's just a matter of when I go into labor and if that person can get here fast enough, and me have a ride to the hospital to meet my mom who is about 40 miles away.

Second we have the issue of who will stay with me in the hospital. So long as my secret plan works out the way I'm hoping my older sister will be in town and be the one to stay with me. Then my mom would go home to stay with the girls for the night. However if my sister is not here I'm not sure how well my kids will go without Mommy and Grandma for that long.

Now that I wrote my previous blog I can breath. I'm not at all worried about who shows up at the hospital because I promise you if you come before I say you can, you will be turned down and not invited back. I have gotten a lot of positive feed back from the way I feel about things. I think just writing it to where people can read what I plan on doing made me relax and know things will work out even if they aren't how I "plan".

This past week all I wanted to know is if I was dilated. I went to the doctor today and I am in fact dilated and so much more. Now I am so nervous to be alone. I almost wish I didn't know so then I wouldn't feel this way. But I know if I didn't know it would be just as nerve racking. So everyone who is supposed to be helping or willing to help should be staying by their phone and prepared for that phone call or text saying "Get your butt here because he's coming"

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